Now THIS, Is NYU Football Passion

In an alternate universe, NYU Football replaces UConn in the Big East. The result? Headlines on the sports pages and Page Six, rumors about the stud QB dating Taylor Momsen, and the typical college football recruiting scandals and underage drinking fiascoes that plague the big name programs. I don't know who dreamed up this brilliant scenario, but I'm a fan:

ATLANTIC CITY, NJ - Taylor Momsen, an original cast-member of the hit series Gossip Girl, and Lucipherre Laubach, star quarterback for the NYU football team, were arrested Thursday night at the Tropicana Casino in Atlantic City and charged with underaged gambling and underaged drinking. Momsen, 19, and Laubach, 20, were seen holding hands, kissing, and ordering cocktails around midnight at a beach bar, before entering the Trop's casino at 1AM.

The couple continued to order drinks while playing blackjack in the High Limit section of the casino with fellow Violets, Alec Baldwin and Momsen's Gossip Girl co-star Kristin Bell. Our spies report that an anonymous gambler at an adjacent table recognized Momsen and Laubach as minors and alerted casino security who then called the Atlantic City Police.

Momsen and Laubach were escorted downtown, booked, and released around 3AM. Underaged gambling and drinking sentences are usually very light, with community service likely for first-time offenders. However, Laubach is likely to receive a harsher punishment from his football coach, and father, David Laubach, who enforces a strict curfew on players during the football season.

Momsen's rep denied that Laubach was more than a friend when reached this morning and refused to comment on the arrest.

The author's even set up a budding rivalry:

New York Post: Any idea who recognized you in the casino?

Lucipherre: Yes, I know exactly who it was.

New York Post: Can you tell us who?

Lucipherre: No, that's not important. I'm just looking forward to beating Rutgers next game.

New York Post: Was it a Rutgers fan?

Lucipherre: You could say that.

Welcome to the big time, NYU.

You can follow the amazingly detailed bizarro world history from the beginning here: NYU Violets: Undefeated Since 1942

New Year, No Football At NYU

Welcome to NYU, students!!!

I am not a student. Not any longer. I graduated in 2004 and I am now enjoying an exciting career in journalism. But I haven't forgotten my four years lugging a backpack through Washington Square Park. Many things have changed since I graduated: for instance, the fountain in the park is now 23 feet to the left of where it used to be. But one thing remains the same: there is no New York University Football Team.

Now, chances are, you didn't come to NYU for their athletic programs. Even if you were genuinely enthusiastic about the chance to start on the fencing team, you knew that sports at NYU were kinda like that weird uncle with the bipolar disorder: he's at the family reunion, but everyone kinda keeps their distance.

Unfortunately, this goes beyond having a football team to root for every Saturday. Without a football team, there's nothing on campus to rally around. Sure, NYUers are passionate about politics, weed, music and movies (not necessarily in that order), but none of those things are going to bring the college campus together and keep alumni coming back for more. This is especially important on a campus as dismembered as NYU's... with dorms and classrooms all over the city, there needs to be one place where we can all enjoy our NYUness together.

Other colleges get it. Notre Dame's a fine school, but do you think you'd know what it was if it wasn't for it's football program? I hate Notre Dame, and Rudy made even me misty-eyed.

The truth is, a football program can build allegiance and loyalty more than anything else a college can provide. No one can deny that sports have the power to bring people of different persuasions and personalities together for a common cause. But without anything NYUers can rally around, when we go our separate ways over the summer or after graduation, there's little to bond us together. Outside of Washington Square, its rare to see an NYU sweatshirt. But on Saturday, you're bound to see Michigan's Maize and Blue, Ohio State's scarlet and gray almost anywhere. At those schools, thousands of students come together every Saturday in the fall, and its an amazing sight to see. There's nothing like that at NYU, and that's one reason why school spirit at Manhattan's greatest university is appallingly low. Are you proud to go to NYU?? How can you show it? By waving your course syllabus around??

NYUers need something to cheer for. And if you agree, I urge you to do your part to help make an NYU football team a reality. Who's gonna step up??